This post I guess isn't so much about being a "girl", it's more about being a mother. I probably could post something else on the "girl" side, but this is what is on my heart right now.
Yesterday I had a....well, quite a day...with my almost 3 year old. Anyone who has had a child this age probably knows what I'm talking about when I say this. It was explosion after explosion and it left me wondering who this child was and it also left me really disappointed in myself and how I handled some of his wild fits. After a much needed nap and some time to reflect on this day, last night I remembered when someone told me that their fits are usually because there is something going on inside them that they aren't able to communicate well. This makes sense because during one of the fits when I was trying to get him to tell me why he was getting upset one of the questions I asked him was if something hurts and he said, "yes, momma, my feelings hurt." Break. My. Heart. His feelings were hurt, and possibly because of how I handled some of his outrages. I handled them more with discipline that with "care."
Typically I am the type of mom that believes everything can be fixed with a kiss and some "snuggle time," (at this age anyways!) and have in a way "taught" this to my oldest who now requests "snuggle time" often. But on days when I feel like there is a lot to be done and accomplished "snuggle time" isn't made an importance...my son on the other hand, still needs it. I realized that all he wanted me to do was to slow down, put the chores and errands aside and spend some one on one time with him. Not to say that this needs to happen all day but a good balance is necessary for him to feel secure in his day.
This morning during my quiet time I opened a paper that I keep to mark my place in my Bible. It has the words to some of my favorite worship songs on it. The song "When the music fades" stood out to me and I read/sang it through.
Verse 1 When the music fades All is stripped away And I simply come Longing just to bring Something that's of worth That will bless your heart Bridge I'll bring You more than a song For a song in itself Is not what You have required You search much deeper within Through the way things appear You're looking into my heart Chorus I'm coming back to the heart of worship And it's all about You It's all about You, Jesus I'm sorry, Lord, for the thing I've made it When it's all about You It's all about You, Jesus Verse 2 King of endless worth No one could express How much you deserve Though I'm weak and poor All I have is yours Every single breath *Bridge* *Chorus* *Chorus* I'll bring you more than a song I'll bring you more than a song More than a song I'll bring you more than a song I'll bring you more than a song You're looking into my heart Looking into my heart You're looking into my heart Into my heart I'll bring you more than a song I'll bring you more than a song I'll bring you more than a song I'll bring you more than a song
With my mind still on the day before and "parenting" still on the brain I really connected to it and began correlating it to our TRUE mission as parents to our children in this world.
It is so easy, as parents, to get caught up in the....Schooling, "Sporting", Clothing, Socializing, "Manoring", Fine motoring, Gross Motoring, "Erranding", etc....that we lose the true "heart of parenting."
"All is stripped away
And I simply come
Longing just to bring
Something that's of worth
That will bless your heart"
What is something that is TRULY of worth to our children and their hearts? I believe it's the Love of Jesus and our God. "Above all, Love."
"I'm coming back to the heart of worship
And it's all about You
It's all about You, Jesus
I'm sorry, Lord, for the thing I've made it
When it's all about You
It's all about You, Jesus"
I was told once that children are given to us only for a time, but that they will forever belong to God. What a precious and important gift! (Along with that paper with the lyrics on it I also keep a picture that someone gave me of my first born asleep in his carrier next to their Christmas tree and all of the presents underneath it. This picture is a constant reminder to me that "Children are a gift," even though a temporary one.)
If teaching and showing our children the Love of Christ is the most important thing we can do for our children, why do we cram their lives FULL of all these other things? It's easy to do because most of these things are fun, but collectively it can get to be TOO much. A balance perhaps is the best choice?
I am realizing now that yesterday my son's "world" was not balanced. Love was not the primary focus. In my head right now I am envisioning a balance (like the one in a science class) with "God's Love" on one side and all the "Others" in our lives on the other (If I wasn't computer challenged I would design that up for you!). This is going to be my personal goal for my life and my children's. I realize it will take saying "no" to things more often than I say "yes," but I guess that's what being a parent is all about...not always making the easy choice for your family, but making the right choice for your(every family is different) family.
Rambled enough? I think so :) But I hope you can also do some reflecting on your parenting "goals" (or life goals if you aren't a parent) and try to realign yourself if you have fallen away from the track.