A room of your own...

Wouldn't it be nice to have a space ALL to yourself?! Once I had my sweet kiddos, of course, I lost all sense of "personal space". There would be times when my own husband would try to hug me and I would slightly freak out because I couldn't take one more person in "my space". Poor guy. About a month ago I was reading a book that a good friend of mine loaned me. It's called Boy-Sterous Living by Jean Blackmer (I recommend it to anyone who has boys, teaches boys, or just wants to understand their hubbs better). It's hilarious, is encouraging, and is all around a good read. Becky, you will be getting this back soon, promise!

Anyways one of her chapters is titled, "Think Pink." Basically the premise for why I started this blog, living out your "girl". As one part of this chapter she encourages women, moms, etc...to create a room that is just for her. She says this will help encourage a connection to your girl..."create, grow, pray, and be filled so you can go out and be useful to others".

My first thought, "I TOTALLY agree with this!"

My second thought, "I don't have a whole room to spare!" Mrs. Blackmer addresses this as well and points out that even if you can just make a corner your own, do it!



Getting so old!



Now that my youngest is approaching the year mark I have slowly been able to regain some of my personal space and time(even though he still insists on being attached to me as much as possible), because him and our 3 year old are able to play together. I have decided to take Mrs. Blackmer up on her challenge to make a space just for "you". Until we move the boys into a room together next year my only room currently that is somewhat mine is the hubbs and my bedroom.

SO I have decided to reclaim our bedroom. And eventually when I redo our room this next year, a "girl" corner for myself to relax.

My first step? Limiting the kiddos "use" of the room. A few months ago I began teaching our oldest the word "privacy" especially when it involves women and their need to have time to themselves(ex: in the shower) and this is another aspect of giving others privacy. Our kids have never really slept in our room or anything, because my husband has always seen some the importance of keeping the bedroom a "special" place for just mommy and daddy. I secretly have always loved this rule, it made me feel special that he valued our time together that much. Anyways, back to limiting the kiddos in the room....

Sometimes the only time I get to myself during the day is when I take a shower and sometimes when I put on my make-up. Doing your hair and getting dressed has proved pretty interesting and definitely not peaceful while a baby is climbing up your leg, in the toilet, and pulling things off shelves and a 3 year old is bouncing on and off your bed(which is a no-no in our house, but of course that is tested daily). Today I decided that they did not need to play in our room because they have plenty of toys in their own baby-proofed rooms and do actually enjoy playing together. So, what did I do? I put up the baby gate in the door going to our room (I seriously have not utilized this device enough).

At first I felt bad about restricting them, but then I relaxed, just a little bit, giving myself a slight break from the pressure I felt to constantly be in the same room at all times. I was okay with it because, a) the room they play in is 3 feet from our bedroom door and I could see and hear them, b) I have learned to get ready incredibly quickly, c) they didn't mind it a bit, and d) I could get ready even faster because I wasn't having to fish things out of the toilet that our little man decided needed to go in there.

The old me, the pre-kids me, would have thought this was an incredibly selfish thing to do. BUT now I realize that in order to be a better momma, a less stressed person, and a much more "loving" wife and mother, you need to take some time for yourself. Know your limits of course...A typical 5 minute routine probably shouldn't turn into 2 hours :)

Day 1 of reclaiming a space for "me", a success. Here's to hoping our 3 year old doesn't realize that he is, in fact, strong enough to push down that gate...

Eventually I'll get to that "corner" in our room.

My Vow....

I Vow...

...to keep my hair long even though my boys are constantly pulling on it.

...to continue to wear my bracelets, necklaces, dangly earrings, etc...even though the boys are WAY to fascinated by them and pull at them ANY chance they get.

...to keep making my "fancy" vegetables even though I get weird looks and growls by the males each time I do.

...to still put decorations out in my house despite how many get knocked down, hit by footballs, or sometimes, broken.

...to still attempt to keep a tidy house even though 3 seconds after I pick something up it is misplaced again.

...to TRY to find joy and humor in the paint smudges on the walls, mud on the floors, hair being pulled, bruises from being tackled without warning, and food they don't like being "accidentally dropped" for the dog.

Yes, this is my vow as a mom of boys...who is also striving to remain a GIRL.

Yep, they look cute, don't they? This fact gets me through a lot ;)

Be a woman who...

I found this sign this morning and even though I have already found my man, I still like it and hope we all have and will find a man who will be this type....

It also started me thinking...if we expect this out of our man, shouldn't we also set ourselves with the same expectation?

Be a Woman...

1. Who promises to give your spouse laugh lines when they are old,

2. Who tells him you're proud of him on a daily basis,

3. Who puts your spouse's happiness on the same level as yours,

4. Who uses positive superlatives when describing him and your relationship with each other,

5. Who uses "when" and not "if" when talking about your future and how he fits into it.

Also can be used as a mother to your children...

Be a Mother...

1. Who promises to give your children the case of the giggles every day,

2. Who tells your children you are proud of them on a daily basis, even when they have grown up and moved into a house of their own,

3. Who puts their well-being on the same level as yours,

4. Who uses positive superlatives when describing them to others,

5. Who uses "when" and not "if" when talking about the future of your family and how they fit into it.

---Something to strive for on many different levels---

Change is Good

So I realize I have not been blogging in quite some time! I have been slightly absorbed in......a book. Obsessed is more like it.

Recently with the release of the movie, The Help, I, of course(mainly because of my nosiness) wondered what the hype was about the book that the movie is based on. After asking some of my friends about it and deciding that I needed something else to read other than my, as of late, boring NF books I dove into The Help.
 

The book is set in the 60's and follows 3 friends and the maids that work in their city. I have been totally intrigued by the relationships between the characters and the culture that they lived in. The book has it's light moments, but for the most part covers some very heavy cultural issues. While I'm not attempting to ignore the more serious topic in the book, I have been noticing some other cultural "norms" in the book that I am SO VERY glad have changed. Mainly the ways that were "normal" amongst the female population.

My list of "Things I am SO glad have changed for Women:"

1. Panty hose....no longer is ts considered a staple in every women's wardrobe. They are hot, delicate, and don't allow sandals or peep-toes to look very lovely. Don't get me wrong, I understand their purpose and wear them occasionally(although I will say my favorite version not the typical skin-toned, it is a pair of gray herringbone hose/stockings! LOVE), but I am glad that, like Aibileen in the book, we are not having to wear them in 100 degree weather because it is considered "proper."

2. Equal Pay. Do I really need to say more about this?

3. Polishing silver. When getting married I had the option to register for "silver." It seemed impractical to us and slightly outdated so we opted for regular silverware. After reading how often they polish and care for their silverware I am SO glad we took the easier option :)

4. Showing skin. This topic is slightly controversial and honestly I don't feel like going too deep into it, but, for real...I am so glad it is acceptable to at least show your arms and neck now :)

5. More job opportunity (for the most part).

I'm sure there are more things that I could think of from the book that have changed, but I am kinda stuck on one thing. I was thinking about the obvious judgement between races in the book, but what about the issues and judgement between the women in the book? The Junior League that the girls are in stuck out to me and the cattiness and elitist attitudes that most of the girls carry. I started thinking and comparing it to today. Not the "league," but the attitudes of the girls. I would LOVE to say that women/girls today have evolved from that.....but I can't. Can you? We (women) do ourselves and our peers a disjustice at the attitude that we carry at times. Why can't we just enjoy each other's company? Without judgement, thinking ourselves better, thinking another is better, without gossiping, etc.....I am not saying that I am not included in this, Lord knows I have my struggles, BUT I am saying why not try to change? Why not, when in the company of another girl or even not in the company of that girl, simply try our best to point out the beautiful qualities of that person (every person has some, if not many!) instead of what we consider the ugly?

Why can't we all just get along?! ;)

Challenge for the week: Be aware of your inner dialogue, ESPECIALLY when thinking about our fellow females and try to be more positive. We, as women, need to be supporting each other, not breaking each other down! Let's "help" out our gender :)

Just a sayin'

I came across this sign on Pinterest and I liked it because it screamed GIRL and it kinda made me feel good, but at the same time I didn't completely agree with it...

"Strength when everything seems to be going wrong"...I believe that it is important to be strong in certain circumstances, but I also believe it is necessary to be able to let it all out. I think that your heart and mind need a breather from the marathon that life tends to be.

"...happy girls are the prettiest girls"...I LOVE seeing, people in general, happy! But, in my opinion, life isn't always peaches and cream (but, yum, wouldn't that be nice?!) and the prettiest girls are the ones who are able to be "real" (respectfully! Not any of this housewives of ______ stuff!) with others.

My favorite on here though is "laughing is the BEST calorie burner"...amen to having a great time and AMEN to burning calories :)

Ha, my husbands favorite is, "kissing, kissing a lot!" Typical ;)

Hoorah for being girl?

No, I did not cook today. So, needless to say, it is not Fab Food Friday. BUT, I will be making a wonderful and easy Key Lime Pie tomorrow that I might just have to chat about in the near future...

My husband pointed out tonight that it has been a while since I last blogged. My response, "I had nothing to say...mainly because I am too exhausted to care." Why was I so exhausted? I found out today, and it is mainly because I am, well, a girl.....so I guess I do have something to say.

Today has been a LONG day, a tiring day, but a very good day.

Today I thought of thyroids....a lot. Thyroids are connected to hormones and when they aren't working correctly you don't feel very good and at the very least, "girly. You feel...blah, and NOT normal(because you aren't!). I have been feeling "blah" off and on for a while now.

Finally with the support of some of the people closest to me I decided to persist, get some answers, and get some HELP (something that is hard for me to ask for and accept).

My answer? Post Pardum Thyroiditis. An enlarged thyroid and a goiter(really wish there could have been a prettier name for this).

My help? Direction, temporary medicine for the next six months (unless it persists), and the relief in knowing that I am not going crazy, I don't have to be this exhausted, and that I can and will feel like myself again.

I appreciate the doctor and his insistence on figuring things out.

I appreciate the encouragement I received.

I appreciate the hope that I now have with this struggle.

And I recognize answered prayers.

The lesson I learned today is that, yes, as women we are STRONG and can do so many amazing things, BUT that doesn't mean we should let that image of strength blur the fact that we also need to let others help us from time to time.

What is this?

Starting about a year ago (around the time we found out we were having another boy to add to the clan) I noticed myself being drawn to activities of the "girly variety." Things that I typically wouldn't do because,

a) the men in my life may not accept it as easily as I would hoped they would,

b) I'm stubborn and just didn't want to be classified as "girly" (a 5 letter word in some situations) and

c) lets face it, it just doesn't come natural in homes where you have to be on the look out for falling objects and tackling toddlers 26 hours a day (2 hours added because of the hour before bedtime and nap time that just seem like an eternity!).

Slowly but surely I began to be okay with it (g****) and I found myself, gulp, LOVING it (g****).

This list is some of the things that I discovered are a must in (my) girl world...

1. Cooking...from scratch (so rewarding!)
2. Drinking out of glass goblets or just plain old glass cups if that's what you have (pinkie up is optional)
3. Animal prints, tastefully please
4. Listen to your favorite music. This may not be "girly" to some but in a house full of boys my vote usually gets outnumbered quickly...(even better, your favs from H.S. or college--bring on the boy bands!)...and belt it! My current fav http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8btEU5-fUEE
5. Sew....a nod to my grandmother and considered a thing of the past to some...but having the ability to create new things is empowering! And, if you don't tell anyone, they won't know how many trys it took you to get the final product looking half-way decent ;)
6. Dare I say it, PINK......I've been slightly against it most of my life, until lately it has been slowly creeping into my life.....and I really can't forget TURQUOISE....kinda quirky, kinda love it
7. Girly, frou frou, foods...the stuff my husband handles at an arms length and what kiddos wouldn't even think of touching. Keep an eye out for Fabulous Food Fridays on the blog...all I have to say is YUM
8. Indulging in your favorite magazine. Yes, even if you have stacks of laundry to put away, it's OKAY to take a break! Two words, Southern Living. I'm of the opinion that southern girls have it all right anyways ;)
9. Another nod to the older gen...EARRINGS! Always a must!
10. Gardening, also very rewarding. Even if only one plant survives...that one plant was meant to make you smile :)
11. Surrounding yourself with beautiful colors....yes I get the whole neutrals trend in decorating, BUT they were meant to have color added to them! So pick your favs and don't limit yourself too much
12. Going along with my whole glass goblets fascination......drinking coffee(or tea...) out of BEAUTIFUL mugs...and throw a tea pot in there every once and while for added loveliness (Again, pinkie up is optional)!
13. Last but not least......don't always buy for function! Throw a little friv (frivolousness) in there! It makes things more fun!

Feel free to let me in on some of yours...

Keeping it "Girl"?

Being surrounded by the male gender my whole life (two brothers, a husband, and now two boys) I have struggled to discover and then maintain the "girl" in me. Recently, I've noticed the "girl" in me screaming out and wanting to make its self known in my wild, grunt-filled, everyday life. And......it makes me feel good...to be a "girl" that is.

So often in our society today I feel like being seen as a "girl" is also seen as a weakness...BUT I have discovered that being a "girl" can not only be beautiful, but also, BOLD (Yes, I realize the reference to the soap, Bold and the Beautiful...cue the rolling eyes of my spouse). These, combined with spunk, manors, quirkiness, and social"ness" makes a wonderful, very proud of, combination that we will call, "girl."

Some of my posts, opinions, ideas, etc....may seem old fashioned at times, but I think it's about time to rediscover what being a "girl" (or, "lady", as I am trying to teach our oldest to say...) is all about. AND, this is very important, embrace it and have FUN with it.

Join me as I continue to bring out AND attempt to live out the girl inside me...

Seriously.

Join me.

Have fun.

Comment.

Tell me how funny I am(...or when I am not. Yes, that can happen).

Ask questions.

Joke.

Tell me where to find great sales.

Share fun, frou frou (you will hear this adjective often from me, and no, I'm not sure if this is the correct spelling of the word), or lovely (kind of love that word---sounds so girly doesn't it?!) things.

And the greatest of all, LOVE.